This page was nominated for deletion on 6 March 2016. The result of the discussion was shave.
Method Of Shaving
My suggestion for shaving:
Drag him to a ICRAGSlave Auction. Past examples of auctions include people having their carefully cultured sideburns - grown patiently for years - shaved off (and almost the eyebrows too), so a beard would be considered child's play for them to remove.
Raise some money, probably in the region of £100-£200, to "buy" Jim - so he is your property for the night and has to do as you order. Raising more than this helps as you can bribe the Rugby Club with drinks to stop any escape attempts.
Commence shaving!
Might I suggest the next London Meetup coincides with the next Slave Auction?