User:Neurolysis/Apology

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Many people suspected it and many people have been out with it and told me their suspicions, so I am going to be out with it now, because I believe transparency is one of the things that needs to be retained on Wikipedia, even if it is a nigh-on impossible task.

I was Asenine up until the beginning of October 2008. I loved my time here, and I loved the feeling that I was actually contributing to something of my own will without anything other than my personal satisfaction at volunteering driving my efforts. Therefore, when people called me arrogant, accused me of lacking the ability to assume good faith, and of being overly bureaucratic (the latter of which I particularly resented), I began to look upon my actions with disappointment. With the sheer number of people opposing based on these traits I began to see them in my actions, but gladly not in myself. People who I respected, and still respect for that matter, questioned my actions, calling them unacceptable, and saying that I had a temperament problem. I began to realise that they were wrong in only one aspect - that it was the person behind the account that was doing these things. I assure you, it was merely a persona which I established without realising I had done so, and had failed to get out of the loop of replicating it, even with the space of a year to do so. Frankly, I was utterly disgusted with my actions, and it was around this point that I realised I probably would have opposed myself - and that is not a good sign.

Because of all of this, I wanted to disassociate myself with my previous actions. I began to believe that change could only come with a new identity and a fresh start - a chance to show the community what I could achieve if I really wanted to, so I created my current account, Neurolysis. With this new identity on Wikipedia, I hoped I could retain the good stuff that I associated with my old handle without bringing along the arrogance and general inappropriate nature alongside it. Some people already have known of this change, and I thank them for keeping it under wraps whilst I was wondering how to be vocal about my change of accounts. My delay in writing an apology was to give what I considered a reasonable grace period, enough for people to see that I am serious about changing my habits, and serious about being of benefit to the community.

I want to say sorry to all the people I have offended, all the people I have been condescending towards, and all the people who had trust in me of whom I unknowingly betrayed. I but hope that I can make up for my previous ills with a fresh start and new name.

- Chris ( — neuro(talk) )