Talk:Man singet mit Freuden vom Sieg, BWV 149/GA1

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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 15:34, 20 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]


I'll have this to you ASAP JAGUAR  15:34, 20 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Initial comments

  • If possible, I would recommend expanding the second paragraph of the lead so that it appears proportionate. I think the lead already summarises, so don't worry if there's nothing else to add!
will try --GA
  • "The text is focused on the guardian angels" - this should be in present tense, focuses?
taken --GA
  • "The libretto was written by Christian Friedrich Henrici, better known as Picander," - this should be in brackets
not sure, because our article is Picander, not the real name - I would say only Picander but inherited the sentence. I recently merged the article from two which we had on different titles, DYK? --GA
  • "The Bach scholar Klaus Hofmann notes that Battle scenes" - does 'battle' have to be capitalised here?
typo, thanks for catching that --GA
  • " he replaced two horns by three trumpets and timpani" - with three trumpets
taken --GA
  • "It is a prayer to be sent an angel to carry the soul" - this doesn't read right to me, would it sound better as It is a prayer to be sent by an angel to carry the soul?
can't change that, see translation: "Ah, Lord, let Your dear little angel, at my final end, take my soul to Abraham's bosom." - or do you have a better way of paraphrasing it? --GA
  • "Bach chose The same stanza" - no capitalisation
sure --GA

References

Thank you, very prompt and efficient, --Gerda Arendt (talk) 19:58, 20 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]

On hold

I don't like leaving short reviews, but those were the only prose issues I could bring up with this article. Otherwise, it's another well written and comprehensive article! I feel that the second paragraph of the lead could be expanded, but if it's not possible then don't worry. Once all of the above are clarified then this will be good to go. JAGUAR  16:21, 20 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks again for addressing them, Gerda! This now meets the GA criteria. Well done JAGUAR  20:07, 20 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]
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