Talk:Geoffrey Massey

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Did you know nomination

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Yoninah (talk) 12:24, 20 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

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Created by Ktin (talk). Self-nominated at 07:14, 12 December 2020 (UTC).[reply]

  • Hi Ktin, I'll pick this one up. Article was created 12 December; article is of good length; article is adequately well written (there are a couple of unusual turns of phrase but nothing major); article is cited inline throughout to what look to be reliable sources; I didn't spot any overly close paraphrasing from the sources; I can't access either of the sources used to support the hooks, are you able to provide quotations to support these; I would note that the article text doesn't currently support the first hook, it only states that he took part in debates on urban design, not that he was introduced to the field by Le Corbusier's work - Dumelow (talk) 06:29, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Thanks @Dumelow:. Here you go. At Harvard, much of the academic and peer discussion had centred on new ways of designing urban environments, including Le Corbusier’s entirely new city of Chandigarh in India. He hoped to find similar opportunities in fast-growing British Columbia.Once hired, however, Mr. Massey was dismayed when he saw drawings of its rigid urban template and monotonous house designs. He then realized that instead of Canada’s Chandigarh, this would be Alcan’s company town – economically driven and utterly banal. It was his first rude awakening to the limitations of his chosen profession. -- This one is for the first hook. For the second hook here's the text As a Vancouver city councillor with Art Phillips and TEAM in 1972, he was part of a political movement that put a stop to freeways and redeveloped the south side of False Creek from industrial to residential.. Thanks. Ktin (talk) 06:37, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks Ktin, I am happy this source supports what is stated in the article but not convinced that ALT0 reflects this. I've reworded ALT1 slightly ("ended freeways from entering" didn't sound right to me) and am happy to approve that one. QPQ has been carried out - Dumelow (talk) 07:09, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Dumelow: Pardon the delay, was busy in the offline world. I think this looks good. Ktin (talk) 07:06, 19 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

GA Review

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Reviewing
This review is transcluded from Talk:Geoffrey Massey/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 16:56, 25 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]


Comments

  • "As an urban planner he was " -> "As an urban planner, Massey was..." (you've mentioned Erickson in between so "he" is uncertain).
  • "city of Vancouver and development of Granville Island in the city." repetitive use of "city" in one sentence.
  • No need to link common geographical places like London.
  • Question: which Engvar? "a theater artist" theatre for Brit.
  • "father's career took him to Broadway" feels out of order as you've already said his father was a Broadway actor.
  • "Canadian military" any more, like which arm?
  • Bachelor of Arts is normally capitalised.
  • "towards urban design, including introduction" I would split these.
  • Interestingly, Chandigarh doesn't mention "grounds-up" or "ground-up" (although to me the latter makes more sense).
  • "building a new township Kitimat" -> "building Kitimat, a new township, ..."
  • "designs and rigid design templates.[1] He met Arthur Erickson and they partnered on many design projects" "design" overdose.
  • "met Arthur Erickson and they partnered on many design projects.[3] ... Partnering with Erickson," repetitive.
  • "that would beat 71 other submissions to end up winning the competition." -> "that beat 71 other submissions to win the competition."
  • "and going for a " -> "and adopting a"
  • "Earlier in 1963," reads odd, like you're saying "earlier in the year". Do you mean "Earlier, in 1963, ..."
  • "architect, Ron Thom, to win"' our article calls him Ronald, any reason we don't here?
  • "He became a ..." he ... he ... he ... he .... mix it up a bit.
  • "her modernist house" overlinked.
  • "Source(s):" well, there are four, so just "Sources:" would be fine.
  • I would expect "notable" works to have articles.

"*  Done changed. Ktin (talk) 19:33, 1 April 2021 (UTC) That's all I have for a first pass, on hold. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 19:54, 31 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@The Rambling Man: Many thanks for this detailed and thoughtful feedback. Let me work on these pointers and will notify you once the changes are ready for your eyes. Ktin (talk) 20:11, 31 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Another set of comments

I had thought of reviewing this article but then didn't have the time. But I made a few notes at the time, which I have reproduced here for whatever they are worth:

  • His father was a very well-known film actor, not just theatre.
  • Geoffrey was raised by his famous father, how did that affect him?
  • Sources are dominated by obituaries, would be good to have some other kinds of sources.
  • In particular would be good to have some real architectural criticism.
  • fns 3 and 4 are to the same thing
  • Why did his partnership with Erickson end?
  • '... due to agonies ...' – that word seems a little over the top.
  • In what branch of Canadian military did he serve, and in what role?

Needless to say, you are free to act on these comments or not as you see fit. Wasted Time R (talk) 17:26, 1 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Ktin let me know when you think you might address these? The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 10:33, 7 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for your patience on this one The Rambling Man. Certain off-wiki / IRL activities have meant that I have not been able to spend much time on Wiki, and this is expected to continue through mid-next week. Please can I request some additional time to get to this. Thanks. Ktin (talk) 16:05, 7 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for your patience The Rambling Man. Have incorporated most of the requests. Please have a look at your convenience and let me know if you'd need anything more from my end. Cheers. Ktin (talk) 02:21, 19 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Ok, that's fine, good to go. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 11:59, 21 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]
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