Talk:Daniel Sickles's leg/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Zawed (talk · contribs) 09:18, 17 February 2022 (UTC)

I've reviewed articles on military personnel and units, battles, ships, aircraft, memorials and statues, books, even racing cars. Why not review one on a leg? Comments to follow in due course. Zawed (talk) 09:18, 17 February 2022 (UTC)

• Originally commanding the Excelsior Brigade...: there are three instances of "command" or its derivatives in this sentence, consider changing it up. The last one could be "he would also lead the III Corps at the Battle of Gettysburg."
  • Done
• With his line crumbling, Sickles rode up to the III Corps at The Peach Orchard...: this suggests that the entire III Corps was at this position, not sure if that is meant? Also "The" should be lower case.
  • Clarified that it was only part of the III Corps, and have lowercased the "the" in Peach Orchard
• The injury had broken both lower leg bones.: suggest "The impact of the shot had broken both of the bones of his lower right leg." Part of the reason for this suggestion is make clear to the reader that the lower leg has two bones. I first read this as referring to both left and right legs.
  • Done
• ...more severe than thought...: suggest "more severe than first thought"
  • Done
• Sickles sometimes visited the limb...: suggest "He sometimes..." (Sickles is name dropped in the previous sentence). Also suggest changing up one of the "sometimes" that appears in this sentence.
  • Done
• including once Mark Twain: suggest "including, on one occasion, Mark Twain..."
  • Done
• Battle of Gettysburg is a dupe link, both in the lead and in the body of the article.
  • Corrected
• Image tags are OK

That's about it for me. Zawed (talk) 08:38, 22 February 2022 (UTC)

• @Zawed: - Thanks for the review! These should all be addressed now. Hog Farm _Talk 15:41, 22 February 2022 (UTC)

• Looks good, passing as GA now. Zawed (talk) 08:58, 24 February 2022 (UTC)

• For lack of an obvious section, I listed it under the GA articles for Military decorations and memorials. Zawed (talk) 09:06, 24 February 2022 (UTC)