Talk:Child custody laws in the United States

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Residence and the Convention on the Rights of the Child

The outmoded terms and concepts "custody" and "visitation" were superceded years ago by "residence" and "contact", with the fundamental premise that children are not property. These principles have been ratified into law by almost every country in the world, and the amendment of the article accordingly must be given high priority. The article is irrelevant without these major clarifications. At most, references to "custody" should form a mere addendum to a "child residence" article. 222.166.160.28 7 July 2005 15:00 (UTC)

Says who? I don't think that, in the U.S., where family law is still primarily a state (as opposed to federal) matter, many states have adopted this new terminology. Terry Thorgaard (talk) 19:30, 5 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I am not clear about why this U.S.-focused article would need to be prefaced with claims about what occurs in nations other than the U.S. 68.42.64.201 (talk) 20:11, 15 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Where?

Where does this talking about. USA, UK?

In the UK the old custody order has beeen replaced with a residence order. The idea of where the child resides and parental responsibilities is now pretty well seperate.

OK silly me it says "New York state!". What is the intention of this page? Is it to grow to cover child custody in every state and every country? If this is to be expanded for every legal concept is this too much detail for Wikipedia?

I don't understand this sentence from the "New York State" section: "Since the 1970s the divorce laws in most western nations recognized fathers as real parents and both parents are financially responsible, was the emergence of custody battles." Will someone please re-write it so that it makes sense grammatically? Terry Thorgaard (talk) 19:44, 5 November 2015 (UTC) Never mind: I changed the sentence, a minute or so ago, so as to make sense. Terry Thorgaard (talk) 14:50, 28 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Sounds a good idea! I have recast the page to provide more easily for state/country entries. BTW the comment below as to custody law under shari'a law would have gone well on the main page, but I hesitate to put it there myself.

Ariwara 22:37, Nov 14, 2004 (UTC)

Child Custody in Islam for Sunni Muslims (England)

If and when a marriage unfortunately comes to an end, the problems of the parties involved should not in any way affect the children. Children are a trust (amanah) from Allah and they should be treated and looked after in a proper manner.

They have many rights, of which two are of utmost importance: to receive proper care and love, and the other proper upbringing (tarbiyah). Theses rights of a child can not be fulfilled except with the joint endeavour of the parents. The love, care and attention of the mother is just as important as the upbringing and training of the farther.

In light of the above, divorce should definitely be avoided as much as possible, especially in the case where children are involved. The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said:

“Divorce is the most hated of all lawful (halal) things in the sight of Allah” (Sunan Abu Dawud, no. 2178).

However, if divorce did take place, and both parties demand their rights, then the right of custody will be in the following way. In should be remembered here that there is nothing wrong in making a mutual arrangement, as long as there is no objection from those who have a right to custody.

The mother has a right of custody for a male child until the child is capable of taking care of his own basic bodily functions and needs, such as eating, dressing and cleaning himself. This has been recognized at seven years of age.

Imam al-Haskafi (Allah have mercy on him) states:

“The custody of a male child is the right of the mother until the child is capable of taking care of his own self. This has been approximated at seven years of age, and the Fatwa (legal verdict) has been issued on this age, as normally children are able to take care of themselves at this age” (See: Radd al-Muhtar, 3/566).

In the case of a female, the mother has this right of custody until she reaches puberty. This has been declared at nine years of age. (al-Mawsili, al-Ikhtiyar li ta’lil al-mukhatr, 3/237).

The right of custody will be taken away from the mother if she:

1) Leaves Islam

2) Openly indulges in sins such as adultery and there is a fear of the child being affected

3) She does not attend to the child due to her leaving the house very often

4) She marries a non-relative (stranger) to the child by which the child may be affected

5) She demands payment for the upbringing of the child if there is another woman to raise the child without remuneration

In the above cases (when the mother no longer has the right to custody), this right then transfers to the following in order:

a) Maternal grandmother, and on up;

b) Paternal grandmother, and on up;

c) Full sisters

d) Maternal half sisters

e) Paternal half sisters

f) Maternal aunts

g) Paternal aunts

After all the avenues of the female have been exhausted as explained by the Jurists, the males have the right of custody in the following sequence:

a) Father

b) Paternal grandfather

c) Real brother

d) Paternal brother

e) Maternal brother

The reason for this is that, in the early years, the mother and the other female relatives are more suitable for raising the young child (regardless of sex) with love, mercy, attention, and motherly care. The male child after reaching the age of understanding (7) is in need of education and acquiring masculine traits, which is why he is then transferred to the farther. The female child, after reaching the age of understanding is in need of being inculcated with female traits, which she receives by living with her mother. After reaching puberty, she is in need of protection which the farther offers.

In a Hadith recorded by Imam Abu Dawud in his Sunan, the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said to a woman who complained that her husband was intending to take her child away from her: “You are more rightful of the child as long as you don’t marry” (Sunan Abu Dawud, no. 2276 & Mustadrak al-Hakim, 2/207).

It should also be remembered that after the transferral of custody from the mother to the farther, the boy remains in the custody of the farther until puberty, at which point, if he is mature and wise, he is free to choose with whom to live, or to live on his own. As for the girl, custody remains with the farther until she marries (See: Qadri pasha, Hanafi articles, 498 & 499).

Irrespective of who (mother/father) has the rights of custody, the other party has visitation rights according to mutual understanding and consent. Generally, the party having the rights of custody uses the child as a weapon to punish the other party by depriving them of visitation rights. This is totally against the concept of Islam and a grave sin. It is also very harmful to the child.

At all times the father of the child is responsible for maintaining the child; in the case of a female, until she marries; while in the case of a healthy male, until he reaches maturity. In the case of a disabled child (male or female) the father is permanently responsible.


When the mother has the rights of custody but does not have a shelter to stay in with the child, the father must provide shelter for both. (See Radd al-Muhtar of Ibn Abidin).

With the above, I hope all your questions have been answered.

And Allah Knows Best Muhammad ibn Adam Darul Iftaa Leicester, UK

Recast page

I have recast the page as essentially for the U.S., moving material to parental responsibility which is the more generally recognised area of law. David91 03:32, 10 November 2005 (UTC)[reply]

NPOV removed

The article changed significantly since Dec. 2007, I've removed the NPOV template, please use {{POV-section}} or better yet {{POV-statement}} for statements and detail issues here. This will help address them quickly. - RoyBoy 19:41, 5 February 2012 (UTC)[reply]

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Merger Proposal

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section. A summary of the conclusions reached follows.
The result of this discussion was to complete the merger.Arllaw (talk) 21:53, 23 July 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I propose that Possessory conservator be merged into Possessory conservator. Although Possessory conservator presents itself as if it is a broader discussion of U.S. law, it is in fact a discussion of Texas custody law and terminology.Arllaw (talk) 16:34, 13 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Trying to receive partial custody of my son

Trying to receive partial custody of my son The mother is being unfair and won’t let me see my son or have any contact with him we was in a relationship and it didn’t work she’s taking it out on me and my son what can I do to have a relationship with my son. 2601:4A:C102:7FB0:147B:61D0:4CB8:C8DF (talk) 15:49, 14 March 2022 (UTC)[reply]

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