Talk:CSS Alabama's Indian Ocean Expeditionary Raid
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First comment
You might need to work harder on :-
- Neutrality: “a beautiful torching”?? What sailor would think a burning ship is beautiful? Whoever it belongs to?
- Peacock phrases: “ the Stainless banner was unfurled”???
- Tense: the article uses a mixture of past tense and present historic tense; present historic isn’t really a good style
- Geography: the Sunda strait leads from the Indian ocean to the Java Sea, the Gasper and Karimata straits to the South China sea, the Malacca Strait back into the Indian ocean. Doesn’t really touch the Pacific. Maybe the next one should be re-named East Indies ER.
Xyl 54 (talk) 13:39, 14 November 2008 (UTC)
Good points. My initial construction of the article leans heavily on my own notes, thus the "beautiful" torchings by His Excellency, Captain Semmes. I'll be going back over these raids to fill more meat on the bone, and will recompose some of that as I do so. The "Stainless Banner" is the name of the Confederate Flag, and flags are "unfurled" in Navy speak, so that is normal language. I think its better than "the Confederate flag was hung up" or something like that. The tense is from my notes, and yes, needs to be changed in tense. On the last part, the expedition covered the IO, but the prizes all happened to come on the eastern areas, but East Indies Expeditionary Raid is not a bad title, I'm open to that. Perhaps it can be renamed and moved at some point. I went by body of water names for consistency. Grayghost01 (talk) 18:47, 14 November 2008 (UTC)
Tonnage of the Clipper Contest
Do not see how to edit that, so will state here that she was registered at 1098 tons, but was 1500 measured, per American Clipper Ships 1833-1858, Volume I, by Howe and Matthews.
Rocksnstars (talk) 16:50, 17 June 2012 (UTC)Tom Hoffelder
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