Talk:Battle of La Haye-du-Puits/GA1
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GA Review
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 17:24, 15 March 2024 (UTC)
I'll review this, hopefully over the coming weekend. Hog Farm Talk 17:24, 15 March 2024 (UTC)
- For an article of almost 7,000 words, the lead could be fleshed out a bit more
- "for example, was attached to the 9th, 83rd and 90th Infantry Divisions" - is there a reason why the 9th Division is not linked here?
- "the commander of the German 353rd Infantry Division [de]." - I'd drop the interwiki link here; our article actually has more content than the German one
- "even before the artillery had opened fire." - the German or American artillery?
- "With the envelopment maneuver had failed," - are we sure this is grammatically correct?
- Is is Le Salons or Le Sablons? Both spellings are used
- " During the day, the 90th Infantry Division had advanced about 1,200 yards (1,100 m) at a cost of around 600 casualties,[58]" - this ends the paragraph. Is something missing on the end of this, or should the comma be a period?
- "First Lieutenant Arch B. Hoge Jr. raised a Confederate flag that his father had carried in World War I and his grandfather had carried in the American Civil War over the town" - source mentions his uncle in WWI, not his father
- Who is Fales?
Ready for the 8-14 July section. Hog Farm Talk 02:32, 21 March 2024 (UTC)
- "The 8th Infantry Division, despite captured the ridge overlooking the Ay River." (from the lead) - this is a sentence fragment
- " and both the company commander and the [75] Company K withdrew under cover of darkness." - I can't tell if this is missing a word or has a bonus "the"
I'll finish up the required spot-checking later today. Hog Farm Talk 19:56, 22 March 2024 (UTC)
- On 10 July, the assistant division commander, Brigadier General Nelson M. Walker, was killed while trying to organise an infantry battalion for an attack is very closely paraphrased to the source text of the energetic assistant division commander, Brig. Gen. Nelson M. Walker, was killed as he attempted to organize an infantry battalion for an attack This is okay because the source is PD, but it still isn't great
I spot-checked several other passages and noted no issues. Hog Farm Talk 03:03, 23 March 2024 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.